Onward

All right. I know my last post was pretty bare bones, but I was so horribly depressed by the news we got yesterday that I really didn't want to let myself start "oozing" in public. Today, I'm much more "together," so ... here I am! Mark is still not well, although that is no surprise. He has always been full of surprises, medically, and this may just be a phase. But my strong suspicion is that he has pretty much seen the end of "good days." I found an email from him when I got up to write this morning. "Wake me at 7:15. I don't want to lose another day." He really wanted to go in and do some work at the church, but once he had showered, he was too exhausted. By late afternoon, the pain had picked up again. He was afraid we would have to go to the ER again, but the Vicodin he took seems to be keeping the pain steady. It's still there, but it's not increasing so I THINK we should be able to stay home tonight. He's having trouble sleeping though. Even with three pillows, the pain in his chest is just too severe when he lies down. I think we may have to think about getting a recliner soon, or a bed that goes up and down.

The thing that concerns me is that this is his "good" time of year, historically. Ever since I've known him, the winter has been hard on him, starting in about October. If he gets worse than this ... Well, I guess there IS worse than this. He's not completely bedridden. He CAN still shower by himself, even though it wears him out. He CAN still walk to the mailbox. Slowly, but he can do it most days. So ... it could be worse. But he's seems to me to be on a pretty slippery slope the last three weeks or so.

But ... we do have some good news! Several points, in fact. First of all, some good friends of our paid the fees for us to get a companion dog for Alex!!! We are all pretty excited. Brendan asks me several times a day, "Can we get it TODAY????" We had planned to go through the program which I mentioned on Saturday, which IS an excellent program! But there is a 1 1/2 to 2 year waiting period, and they choose the more needy kids over the higher functioning one. That's quite understandable! But I don't think Alex would be chosen. And even if he was, this program requires that the child and a parent go down and be a part of the training for two weeks. At this point in the game, that could be a little complicated! It could be done, of course! But ... it'd be tricky. So I got to thinking, "What do we really need?" Well, we need to either get a dog that is certified as a companion dog, so that our landlord will have no choice but to let us have it. Or we need to find one under twenty pounds. Getting a certified dog would be more challenging (and expensive) so we're looking to find something smallish. The thing is ... it needs to be mellow, too. Relatively. I mean, we can't have something like our neighbor's yippy Pomeranian! That would kind of be counterproductive if the goal is to provide a "relaxing canine therapy" for the kids. So I emailed the Humane Society, told them what we are looking for. Also, I am putting the word out to people we know (including you! that is, assuming "you" live in the area!).

Also, the church is sending us gift cards to buy the kids school supplies and school clothes. And they've set us up with a mechanic in the church who is going to tune up our van for free. It's humbling to have to accept this kind of help, and yet ... it's touching, too. It makes me feel like we're really a part of a community, that we have this rather sturdy safety net underneath us, that while we may bounce frighteningly high sometimes, we aren't going to crash into the floor.