A Quick Update

As soon as I picked up Brendan from kindergarten, I went into Newberg to get Mark's signature on some paperwork for a meeting I was supposed to have this afternoon. I found Mark so bad off that he couldn't even write his name. The doc decided to do a blood gas and ... sure enough! His CO2 levels were rising. Unable to stay awake for more than about 5 -10 seconds at a time (literally. I'm not exaggerating), when he was asleep, he was snorting and otherwise breathing quite noisily. Left like that, he would have gradually stopped breathing. But luckily they caught it in plenty of time to reverse it with a couple of hours on the bipap machine. But here's the rub ... Now they can't give him the narcotics or the phenergan for nausea. Once he'd had a couple of hours of solid sleep when he didn't have to struggle to breathe, he woke up with significantly better color to his skin. But ... he was very nauseous. He was throwing up bile, and was just generally extremely ill. They haven't moved him to the ICU, but they did move him to a room closer to the nurse's station so that they can keep a closer eye on him.

Time Flies

I told my mom this morning that I'm not sure why I thought I could keep up my blog since I can barely keep my head up!

Mark was in the hospital last Tuesday for liver pain, then back in again in the evening when his heart went into SVT. After that, he had a couple of days of mostly just sleeping, then a couple of days of being able to be up and around the house, even to the mailbox at the end of the drive a time or two. Then he started going downhill again. He started vomiting Monday morning and I took him in when he couldn't keep down fluids or his meds. Well, three days later ... he's still there. They started him back onto solid foods today, and it seems to be going okay, but he can't come home until they're sure that he can take (and keep down!) his meds orally.

Me? Well, I'm doing transcription, as I mentioned, and REALLY loving it. The subject matter is very interesting to me, and it's a double bonus that I get to sit and eavesdrop on people's speech patterns for future fiction writing. (Writing dialogue is an art--and not an easy one to master!) I also had a 1 1/2 hour training with the Sweeney's. I officially start working with Country Heritage Farms on Friday. And I got the word that I was officially hired on with PAX so I should get the training material for that by week's end. So ... no lack of things to keep me busy over here!

That said ... I need to go brain dead for a bit before I try to sleep. Maybe I can find something mindless to download and listen to off the Internet while I do a bit of cross stitching. I find that to be SO therapeutic. We wouldn't need anti-anxiety meds if therapist across the country would just give patients a blank canvas, a needle, a pile of floss, and some nice classical music ... (If only it were that easy, eh? But ... it certainly helps!)

Adios--until next time I surface for air! (No promises on when THAT will be, however!)

A Quick Overview

This week hasn't been terribly exciting here, but it's been good. First of all, I've been doing some transcription work for a professor that my mom was working for. She asked Ginny (professor) if she could take me on, too (and if not "too," then ... instead. Yey, Mom!) And I've been working like a MADwoman this week. Also, I had to make two trips up to OHSU with Mark, one for a sort of checkup (which he has every couple of months) and one for the ventricular MRI that he needed to prep for his ablation.

Oh, and I got a job!! My friend, Pieper, runs Country Heritage Farms (www.countryheritagefarms.com) with her husband and in-laws. She has taken me on, 15 hours or so a week for starters. I'll come in to the office one day a week to do filing and such, but most of what I do from them will be at home, on my own hours. I am SO excited by this opportunity and ... touched, I guess, because she created this job for me. So ... I'm going to be busy! But a little of that is a good thing, imo. While I DO--sincerely--appreciate all the handouts people have given us, it really feels GOOD to work for a paycheck, to feel like at least I'm giving something back.

What else? Not much. Things are smoother with Kayte. (Thank God!) Mark hasn't been in the hospital for pain all week. (Thank God again!!) Alex is ... not so great. Seems to be showing some mild signs of OCD, but I'm going to get him to a specialist pronto to make sure he has the help he needs to get him through these next few years. (Just what we need! More medical bills! But ... we do have insurance. It would just be a copay. And ... well, I think he deserves all the help he can get, frankly.)

Dr. Vader

I have to tell you guys the sweetest little story. Well, it didn't start out sweet! Brendan has been complaining of a "funny feeling" in his ear the last couple of days that raged into a full-blown earache last night. He came into our bed about 2:00. About 4:00, he was still distraught. We had tried heat and peroxide, Tylenol and snuggles, but although he would doze, he would soon wake up sobbing again. After a couple of hours, I decided to try something that wasn't in the Ask a Nurse book I'd pulled off my shelf when this-all started: I let the dog out of his crate. He, of course, darted upstairs and into bed with Brendan, where he licked his sore ear (how could he have known that?) and burrowed down next to him. Brendan LAUGHED and laughed ... and a few minutes later he was asleep. He hasn't woken up since. What is it about dogs that make them so GOOD for ailing people? I don't know! But I've certainly been grateful, many times over, for ours.

A Busy Day

I remember when I was just about to turn 18, I went to visit my family in France during my Christmas break from my freshman year in college. I remember night after night, sitting up alone, reading or what-not, thinking how incredibly BORING and OLD my parents were to go to bed--to WANT to go to bed!--at 9:00 at night. I made myself a solemn pledge that I would never be that way, that I would be LIVELY and energetic and would NOT drag off to bed at ridiculously early hours. Well, I have become just like my parents. Actually, I'm worse! I was sitting at the table at 7:00 tonight, trying to fill out some paperwork, and I felt like I was navigating through a fog. By 8:00, I was pondering whether I could get away with putting Brendan to bed an hour early--just so I could have an excuse to lay down with him! Oh, dear. I am OLD. Boring and OLD ...

To my credit, though, I'll say that this day did start fairly early. Up at 5:30, I was transcribing by 6:00. (Transcribing... as in, working! as in, income!! Yey! This is a temporary job that will probably keep me busy for a couple of weeks, but I know that business success is often more about networking and referrals than anything else, so I'm giving this all I've got!) By 8:00, I had my first document ready to send off. Then I threw on some jeans, ran (well, drove) Alex to school, came home, showered, yada yada yada, and hit the road again at 9:00 for Mark's appointment with his doctor at OHSU.

This was overall a positive visit. Dr. Broberg said that the reason they were hesitant about doing this ablation procedure is that last time Mark had a cardiac catheterization, his heart went into some funky rhythms and his blood pressure dropped. Okay, that's not ideal. But it sounds like things that can usually be dealt with, to me.

We didn't have time to go home before Mark's weekly appointment at the pain center back in Newberg. Brendan and I took care of the recycling I've been carting around in the back of the van, and then we waited at McDonald's. I revised a couple of poems while Brendan played. Then ... home, to get Alex and make dinner and clean up the house in honor of our visitors tonight, who arrived precisely on schedule at 6:30.

Carmen Banke and Caroline Harris had come to talk with us on behalf of the See Ya Later Foundation (http://www.seeyalater.org/index.html) which was begun in memory of the Banke's son, Scott, who died of cancer as a 12-year-old in 2001. In addition to providing our church with a HUGE indoor playground, the foundation also provides scholarships, sports camps, and something they call Seeds of Hope. They aim to choose one family that is dealing with an illness (either of a parent or a child) each month. They usually host a party at the playhouse for the kids and their friends, but they also provide practical assistance in ways that vary from family to family. All we know for sure at this point is that we have been chosen to be this month's family. We'll find out more as we go along, but for tonight, we were mostly just sitting down and chatting about our family's needs and interests and so on.

I have to say ... it's really encouraging to me to see what Bob and Carmen have done with their loss. It's hard enough to watch Mark go through what he is going through and to know that we will lose him probably sooner rather than later. But I still can't even imaging what it would be like to have to watch one of my children go through this. And yet ... they carry on. Not only do they "survive," but they've turned their grief and loss into a source of joy and hope for many, many children and their families. Like ours! I only hope that we can live and let go with as much grace and dignity and compassion as this family has shown.

Long Time No See!

Hello, folks! Well, I'm back. I have had a productive winter, holed up in my cave. I rewrote my novel, from start to finish, and plan to pitch it at the Willamette Valley Writers Conference in August. I've also sent out TONS of poetry--and had the vast majority of it rejected (although I've also received some treasured encouragement from editors who find it either "good, but not right for them" or "good, but not quite there." But I have had a cinquain published recently in Amaze, and I recently received an acceptance from Cell 2 Soul, an online journal that tries to provide a platform for physician, patients, and their loved one to "meet." Five of my poems will be out there within two weeks. (I'll provide the link when they appear.)

Other than that, I've been mostly just taking care of the family. (Although there's really no "just" about it! This family is lot of work! But then ... most families are.) The kids are doing well. Kaitlyn (who, for the record, is now Kayte) is doing well, and/but is very thirteen. I'm going to spare you all the details of last weekend's clash, except to say that I've realized how easy it is to fall into a "parenting lull" after the challenges of the preschool years have drifted away. The teenage years clearly require a more "ramped up" approach to parenting. But she's fine, really. And we're fine. Just ... being stretched!

Alex is doing GREAT. He has a good friend, Zach. His first friend that is really HIS, and not a playmate I threw him together with. He is loving school and doing well and GROWING like a blackberry vine! (And eating like a herd of elephants ... How my aunt Kathy managed to keep FOUR boys fed without breaking the bank is beyond me!)

Brendan is also doing well. (The picture above is him showing off the boxing kangaroo he won at last night's Pirate Carnival at their school.) He's loving kindergarten (although he finds the long days on Mondays and Wednesdays a bit much for him). His reading and writing abilities are just taking off, and he LOVES to read anything and everything. Although ... don't you DARE tell him what a word is! If he has to struggle with it, then ... he has to struggle with it, doggonit! He does NOT look kindly on people who take away his pleasure at diciphering language by being too "helpful." Just call him "Mr. Independent."

And Vader ...! Our puppy is six months old now. He is THE most neurotic dog I have ever met! He get seriously terrified of ANYTHING out of the ordinary, including a box or bag left in the middle of the floor. (We have lots of boxes and bags around our house, but they BELONG there! Bring in a new one, and he ... flips out.) But he is also the most adorable, affectionate little guy. And SO much fun. And what if he IS a little neurotic? He fits right in, around here!

Not to bring this to a close on a down note or anything, but ... Mark isn't doing nearly as well. His pain continues, with visits to the ER about twice a week, still. His heart is relatively strong, but his rhythms are acting up. He'll be having an ablation on March 12th. I'll fill all of y'all in on that more as we go along. What I know, so far, is that it's a procedure rather like a cardiac catheterization except that once they get up inside the heart they burn the parts that are misfiring to hopefully stop the arrhythmias. They had looked at doing this several months ago, but held off because, as Dr. Broberg puts it, it's "not without risk." But it's not risky like a transplant or some such thing. He SHOULD be fine (well, as "fine" as he gets!).

He had to leave his job at the church last week. He wasn't able to get in there more than once a week (if that). He's at the point now where a trip to WalMart often kicks off such severe chest pain that he ends up in the hospital. To those of you who are praying people, I'd love your prayers on two matters: First of all, Mark's spirit. He's pretty discouraged (understandably!). And secondly, we were tight, financially, even with his paycheck from the church. Now ... we won't possibly be able to make ends meet. I started a writing service (www.dot-the-i-writingservice.com). But here's the catch. I know I'm can write and edit. What I can't do is market! I have a business license and everything, but no clients. I would very much appreciate your prayers that God will send some business my way and that the jobs that he does send will be "door openers" to future work. Oh, and if you want to throw in a prayer that we'll survive Kaitlyn's teenage angst (and that she'll survive US!), that would be grand! Thanks, all. And more again soon ...